Tuesday, 21 June 2011

Dear Bra Manufacturers

I know you have a tried-and-tested formula mapped out for these things already, but I reckon I've hit on an absolutely ingenious new system of measurement for over-the-shoulder boulder-holders.

Instead of the familiar circumference/cup-size combo, simply replace the letters with an appropriate value judgement based on the spectacularity of the orbs contained within.

These could ascend in grades depending on their level of respective awesomeness, for example -

- 34 YOWSA!!!

- 36 AWOOGA!!!

- 38 double-POW!!!

I hope this is of some help or use to you. (Sorry for being a pig and that, ladies - I both appreciate and acknowledge the fact that I really, really need to get laid).


PS - I don't suppose anyone's got that chick above's phone number, have they? It's just that every time I open the Bravissimo catalogue, I swear she's gazing right into my eyes.

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